Building Success – Steps to a More Fulfilling Life

Harold Robert Meyer /The ADD Resource Center  http://www.addrc.org/ 01/03/2024

For more than 30 years, Harold and the ADD Resource Center have been providing compassionate guidance, ADHD and Life coaching, and quality information to children, individuals, couples, and healthcare providers, demystifying and destigmatizing ADHD. Harold can be reached at haroldmeye@addrc.org.

Know Yourself:

Make a realistic appraisal of yourself, including strengths and weaknesses (real or perceived).

Look at your personality, talents, interests, patterns, etc. (You are multi-dimentional; not just an ADDult!)

Know Your Basic Values:

What is really important to you?

Separate the “shoulds” from the “wants.”  Success depends on internal motivation, which means you truly want something rather than half-heartedly “buying into” something someone else thinks is important.

Prioritize Immediate Goals and Determine Long-Range Goals:

Urgent vs. important; Putting out fires vs. planning for the future.

Limited resources vs. unlimited ideas.   Reality vs. fantasy.

The conflicts of basic value vs. achievement.

Long-term goals vs. immediate gratification.

Turn the Overwhelming Into the Do-Able:

Break down long-range goals into interim goals; break down interim goals into manageable segments.

Break down segments into do-able “Baby Steps.”

Assign a specific – but limited – time to accomplish each step. (An idea without a timetable is a fantasy.)

Consider this assigned time an appointment with yourself. This Task-Appointment may be postponed and rescheduled, but not canceled if necessary.

Getting it done okay is almost always better than attempting to do it perfectly.  Getting it done on time is best.

Work with Yourself:

Isolate problem areas and develop compensatory strategies.

Take advantage of accommodations and assistive aides; hire a coach.

Seek and develop an ADD-friendly environment. (The glass isn’t half full or half empty; it’s just the wrong size!)

Put your energy where it will be most productive; delegate or hire help.

Understand your learning style (visual, oral, kinesthetic, etc.) and work with it.

Maximize your non-linear skills (ability to make connections by leaps rather than sequentially), through mind mapping and other problem-solving strategies.

Plan activities with an understanding of your body clock.

Allow time to recharge without feeling guilty.With life so intense, downtime is not just a good idea; it’s critical!

Productivity is not just working hard; it is working more effectively. 

Rest, exercise, escape. These are important appointments with yourself; schedule them on your calendar!

Accept Yourself and Others Will Be More Likely To Appreciate You.

Avoid a “victim” mentality.

Accept that it’s okay not to be perfect. Look for progress, not perfection.

Accept responsibility. You are accountable: ADD is an explanation, not an excuse. Acceptance, not indulgence.

Confront your limitations rather than pretend they don’t exist (realize everyone has problem areas).

Being challenged in some areas doesn’t mean you’re incompetent or disabled. (Edison, Lincoln, Churchill, Einstein, Gates, etc. were also there.)

Enjoy your uniqueness and learn to appreciate and employ your strengths without a “but…”.

Reframe your thinking; “She’s not hyper… she’s just actively exploring the world.”

Remind yourself about all the good stuff; others will always be quick to remind you about the rest.

Eliminate Clutter – Today is the First Day of the Rest of Your Life!

Emotional baggage and low self-esteem.   Let go of past failures – “That was then, and this is now.”

Time.  Don’t say yes unless you can say “when” and actually make it happen comfortably.

Pressure.  Don’t buy into unrealistic/unwanted demands from yourself, your family, friends, etc.

Physical and Environmental.  Take it a step at a time.  If you need to, hire an Organizer

 “Clutter is stuck energy that has far-reaching effects physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually.  The simple act of clearing clutter can transform your life by releasing negative emotions, generating energy and allowing you to create space in your life for all the things you want to achieve. “Clutter accumulates when energy stagnates. In the same way, energy stagnates when clutter accumulates. Initially, clutter is just a symptom of what is happening to you in your life. However, it can become part of the problem itself because the more clutter you have, the more stagnant energy it attracts to itself.” 

                                                                          -Clear Your Clutter with Feng Shui by Karen Kingston          

Maintain a realistic sense of responsibility, obligation, perfection, etc.  Refuse to sell yourself short,       but don’t have unrealistic expectations or make promises you can’t keep, whether to yourself or to another.

                                   Refuse to get sidetracked by issues that aren’t meaningful in your life,                                     Focus on the things that are – or should be –  important.

                                                                                                           –

You Can Learn Strategies and Techniques to Help You Gain Control of Your Life!  

Let the ADD Resource Center be your resource for a better life

Harold Robert Meyer /The ADD Resource Center  http://www.addrc.org/ 01/03/2024

For more than 30 years, Harold and the ADD Resource Center have been providing compassionate guidance, ADHD and Life coaching, and quality information to children, individuals, couples, and healthcare providers, demystifying and destigmatizing ADHD. Harold can be reached at haroldmeye@addrc.org.

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